SUBJECT: VAN WYK, G. // LOCATION: Rynfield (Buffer) // STATUS: Subject is experiencing a 4-second lag in linear time.
SUBJECT: MABUZA, S. // LOCATION: Northmead (Phasing) // STATUS: Physical form currently 80% opaque. Do not engage.
SUBJECT: STEYN, P. // LOCATION: Snake Road Cordon // STATUS: Subject is attempting to communicate with the 1994 Corolla.
SUBJECT: REMAINDER 09 // LOCATION: Sector 4 Alleyway // STATUS: Non-human entity mimicking a discarded 10mm spanner.
SUBJECT: COETZEE, L. // LOCATION: Benoni Library // STATUS: Subject has read the same page for 14,000 hours.
SUBJECT: NDLOVU, B. // LOCATION: Constantia Road // STATUS: Feet are currently 2 inches below the tarmac level.
SUBJECT: UNKNOWN 44 // LOCATION: Unknown // STATUS: Subject is audible but invisible. Sounds like a boiling kettle.
SUBJECT: SMIT, J. // LOCATION: Actonville // STATUS: Subject believes it is still Thursday, March 12, 1992.
SUBJECT: BOTHA, D. // LOCATION: Warp Store Perimeter // STATUS: ALERT—Subject is looking for the Site Manager.
SUBJECT: COROLLA_94 // LOCATION: The Aperture // STATUS: Vehicle is humming in B-flat. Intake is imminent.
SUBJECT: FERREIRA, M. // LOCATION: Lakefield // STATUS: Subject’s shadow has detached and is moving toward Brakpan.
SUBJECT: SINGH, A. // LOCATION: Rynfield // STATUS: Experiencing "Visual Drift." Sees everything in sepia.
SUBJECT: ARCHIVE_88 // LOCATION: Deep Storage // STATUS: A pile of 1980s telephone directories is breathing.
SUBJECT: PRETORIUS, F. // LOCATION: Farrarmere // STATUS: Subject is repeating the word "Spanner" since 04:00.
SUBJECT: KHUMALO, T. // LOCATION: Westdene // STATUS: Subject has grown a third ear that only hears 1990s radio jingles.
SUBJECT: DU TOIT, H. // LOCATION: Benoni South // STATUS: Subject is stuck in a 3-foot loop. Walking but never arriving.
SUBJECT: PIETERSEN, K. // LOCATION: Ebotse // STATUS: Subject’s reflection is 30 years younger than the subject.
SUBJECT: MOLLER, S. // LOCATION: Near the Sinkhole // STATUS: Skin texture has been replaced by grainy newsprint.
SUBJECT: GUMEDE, V. // LOCATION: Industrial Area // STATUS: Subject is leaking light from the fingernails.
SUBJECT: LE ROUX, W. // LOCATION: Side Gate // STATUS: Being actively observed by The Dog. Do not intervene.
SUBJECT: MODISE, O. // LOCATION: Benoni Plaza // STATUS: Subject is speaking backwards but only in French.
SUBJECT: VENTER, L. // LOCATION: The Void // STATUS: Deleted. Replaced by a high-pitched whine.
SUBJECT: JACKSON, D. // LOCATION: Northmead // STATUS: Subject is holding a 1994 newspaper that hasn't been printed yet.
SUBJECT: MULLER, R. // LOCATION: Atlas Road // STATUS: Subject is accelerating while standing perfectly still.
SUBJECT: PATEL, Z. // LOCATION: Cranbourne Ave // STATUS: Subject's fingerprints have turned into barcodes.
SUBJECT: SWART, B. // LOCATION: The Archive // STATUS: Subject is now made entirely of 10mm spanners.
SUBJECT: NXUMALO, S. // LOCATION: Market Street // STATUS: Subject is currently vibrating at 400Hz.
SUBJECT: ROOS, T. // LOCATION: Northmead Ext 4 // STATUS: Subject’s skin has taken on the reflective properties of a 1994 hubcap.
SUBJECT: MAKHANYA, J. // LOCATION: Near the N12 On-ramp // STATUS: Subject is stuck in a permanent state of "merging" with a non-existent lane.
SUBJECT: BLOM, P. // LOCATION: The Warp Store (Basement) // STATUS: Currently occupying the same physical space as a crate of calcified gaskets.
SUBJECT: NKOSI, D. // LOCATION: Rynfield Terrace // STATUS: Shadow is 45 minutes ahead of the subject.
SUBJECT: VISAGIE, B. // LOCATION: Benoni South // STATUS: Subject is sweating liquid mercury. Intake required.
SUBJECT: UNKNOWN 81 // LOCATION: Constantia Road // STATUS: Entity appears to be a school blazer that is perpetually falling but never hits the ground.
SUBJECT: THERON, S. // LOCATION: Lakefield // STATUS: Subject has forgotten the concept of "Tuesday."
SUBJECT: HLOPHE, M. // LOCATION: Snake Road // STATUS: Subject is currently vibrating at a frequency that mimics the sound of a 1991 dial-up modem.
SUBJECT: JANSEN, F. // LOCATION: The Archive // STATUS: Subject has been filed alphabetically under "Miscellaneous Screws."
SUBJECT: DLAMINI, G. // LOCATION: Farrarmere // STATUS: Subject's reflection is refusing to leave the bathroom mirror.
SUBJECT: VAN DER MERWE, S. // LOCATION: Industrial Sites // STATUS: Subject is attempting to weld the timeline back together with a rusted spark plug.
SUBJECT: KHANYILE, L. // LOCATION: Actonville // STATUS: Subject is hearing the thoughts of every 10mm spanner within a 5km radius.
SUBJECT: DE BEER, J. // LOCATION: Side Gate // STATUS: Subject has been successfully "Warped" into a pile of dry leaves.
SUBJECT: MOONSAMY, R. // LOCATION: Northmead // STATUS: Subject is growing a second, smaller Benoni inside their left lung.
SUBJECT: SCHEEPERS, K. // LOCATION: The Void // STATUS: Subject is currently transparent. Please recalibrate the sensor.
SUBJECT: MBATHA, P. // LOCATION: Benoni Plaza // STATUS: Subject is paying for groceries with currency from the year 2044.
SUBJECT: ENGELBRECHT, H. // LOCATION: Tom Jones Off-ramp // STATUS: Subject is perpetually waiting for a light that will never turn green.
SUBJECT: CHETTY, V. // LOCATION: Rynfield // STATUS: Subject’s house is currently 4mm larger on the inside than the outside.
SUBJECT: KRUGER, G. // LOCATION: The Cordon // STATUS: Subject is trying to "un-see" the Corolla. Retraining required.
SUBJECT: MHLANGA, T. // LOCATION: Deep Storage // STATUS: Subject has become a permanent part of the shelving unit.
SUBJECT: SWANEPOEL, D. // LOCATION: Atlas Road // STATUS: Subject is moving in slow motion. Current speed: 1 inch per hour.
SUBJECT: PILLAY, S. // LOCATION: Benoni High // STATUS: Subject is repeating the 1994 matric exams for the 30th consecutive year.
SUBJECT: COHEN, L. // LOCATION: Lakeside Mall // STATUS: Subject is leaking "static" from the eyes.
SUBJECT: MEYER, F. // LOCATION: The Aperture // STATUS: Subject has been converted into a series of binary code strings.
SUBJECT: NAIDOO, K. // LOCATION: Westdene // STATUS: Subject is tasting the colour "Copper."
SUBJECT: BOTES, M. // LOCATION: Near the Dog // STATUS: Subject is currently being "un-made."
SUBJECT: ZUMA, E. // LOCATION: The Void // STATUS: Subject is shouting into the void. The void is shouting back in Zulu.
SUBJECT: VILJOEN, N. // LOCATION: Archive Section B // STATUS: Subject has been replaced by a 1:1 scale model made of biltong.
SUBJECT: GERTENBACH, J. // LOCATION: The Counter // STATUS: Subject is still waiting for service.
SUBJECT: [REDACTED] // LOCATION: [REDACTED] // STATUS: Critical discrepancy. Subject has exited the simulation.
